There are men you
should run from, and there are women you should not pray to fall in love with.
Who are these people? That is the subject of the discussion.
The scripture is full
of wisdom. Not just theoretical wisdom, but pragmatic wisdom that we can relate
to in our day to day happenstances.
If we can just stay
within the boundary of God’s wisdom, we will avoid a lot of heartaches. If we
can follow the simple tips offered to us in God’s word, we will enjoy
some
stability when it comes to relationship and marriage.
There are many
categories of people you cannot get involved with, but we will take a look at a
few,
1.
The Unbeliever
If he or she doesn't know God and has not accepted Jesus Christ as personal saviour, you have no business befriending such. If you are not close friends, chances that you will fall in love with such a person is slim.
If he or she doesn't know God and has not accepted Jesus Christ as personal saviour, you have no business befriending such. If you are not close friends, chances that you will fall in love with such a person is slim.
I know ladies who in
their bid to share the gospel with a fellow guy who is an unbeliever, they
ended up sharing their body and got pregnant. I know guys who in their bid to
win a soul, they actually lost theirs in the hands of unsuspecting jezebels!
Be careful with those
who don't know God. You are not on the same page. You will never think alike.
To the pure, all things are pure, to the impure, all things are impure.
"Do not be
unequally yoked with unbelievers [ do not make mismated alliances with them or
come under a different yoke with them, inconsistent with your faith ]. For what
partnership have right living and right standing with God with iniquity and
lawlessness? Or how can light have fellowship with darkness?"
But what if he is such
a nice person? “Niceness” is not a fruit of the Spirit. In a moment of fit of
anger, niceness can quickly morph into wickedness!
Do you know that it
takes the fear of God not to lift your hands against your wife? Do you know
there are pastors who (shamefully and wrongfully) beat up their wives? So then,
what do you think a person who doesn't know God would be capable of doing?
My advice, if you have
fallen in love with someone who doesn't know God, you should fall out quickly.
2.
The Liar
Everybody has told a lie at one point or the other. There is even more probability that every human being, born again or not, have told a lie and then quickly asked God for forgiveness. Thank God for His mercy. Sometimes, you find yourself in some situations, and in order to save yourself some embarrassments, you tell a lie and then ask for forgiveness.
Everybody has told a lie at one point or the other. There is even more probability that every human being, born again or not, have told a lie and then quickly asked God for forgiveness. Thank God for His mercy. Sometimes, you find yourself in some situations, and in order to save yourself some embarrassments, you tell a lie and then ask for forgiveness.
But here, I am talking
of pathological lairs. You cannot marry such a person. You cannot get involved
with a compulsive, obsessive, inveterate, habitual, persistent, chronic,
hardened, confirmed liar, or else you will be putting yourself into a lot of
trouble.
A good marriage and
great family can't be built on foundation of habitual lies. It will crack. There
are people who have lied to their spouses for several forty years! Such lies
eventually burst open, and the centre cannot hold.
If he or she has been
lying without remorse or repentance, it is time to run without looking back.
3.
The Sex seeker:
That is all he or she wants in a relationship. You met two hours ago, and he is already inviting you over to his house. To come and do what?
That is all he or she wants in a relationship. You met two hours ago, and he is already inviting you over to his house. To come and do what?
You should also be
scared of ladies you met and hours later, they are asking you to kiss them. Something
is not quite right.
There are several cases
of people who slept with just one person and the person loses his or her mind.
Not mild mental cases, but serious madness! Be careful! There are evil men and
strange women. Free sex can be eternal traps! The devil offers nothing for
free. It is a fight for your soul.
If he or she is insisting
on sex before marriage, you have not met your spouse yet!
But, what if we make
mistakes? Yes, you can ask for forgiveness and really, God will forgive you!
But if it happens again and again, then you need to be careful because it’s disastrous.
But,
how will one be sure if he or she is good in bed?
I can assure you, you
are not a “tester” or a “sampler” I can also tell you that if you try it, you
just invited demonic entities who will ensure that testing and sampling
continues with more people and you will never see the right person that way!
If you trust God, you
are led of Him, and you know He is your Father; you will be sure within your
heart that He will not lead you into error! I hope you know that God
knows what He is doing?
4.
The Rebel:
Finally, run away from the rebel. Who is the rebel?
Finally, run away from the rebel. Who is the rebel?
He is out there. She is
out there as well. Everybody is wrong except him or her. No mentor, no pastor,
no authority figures. Nobody can speak to him or her. Nobody can correct her.
Run away very fast!
If he or she tells you
he doesn't need anybody, it is usually a symptom of a deep seated problem
swimming in a labyrinth of more issues.
One of the greatest
problems a person can have is not to be meek. Not teachable! It is a huge
problem.
If somebody has issues
but is teachable, that is high probability that things will work out.
A word to those who may
be married to any of these types of people. It is not time to give up on your
marriage. It is time to fight for it. As long as your life is not being
threatened, you are not being abused, violence is not involved and adultery is
out of it, then you should fight for your marriage. Pray for him or her with
heavenly persistence, and God will come to your rescue. God doesn't really want
divorce, except in some rare cases I mentioned above. The first order of things
is to fight for your marriage, not physically, but prayerfully and with good
attitude!
What if I am in courtship
with such a person? Seek help, meet your pastor, get him or her filled with the
Holy Ghost but if there is stiff resistance to change, back out and deliver
yourself from unnecessary affliction. Remember you will never be able to change
anybody. Also, be aware people can actually pretend to be good until after
wedding. Be careful. Be led. Be prayerful. Stay in God’s word.
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